Keeping It Real

Strong Independent Submissive

I am a strong, smart, independent, worthy, and beautiful woman. I don't need anyone......and yet, I make a damn good slave. I love being told what to do and how to act, I love to be humiliated and hurt and used, and I'm really good at following orders and anticipating needs. How do these things go together? How do I maintain my independence and dignity while being submissive? I feel like I've gained confidence over the last year and I'm more able to stand up for myself. How do I allow someone to treat me so horribly? Why do I WANT to be treated so horribly? I find myself becoming offended by the thought of people telling me what I'm worth and how I should be treated.....and yet, I still crave the pain and humiliation and domination. How do I make this work?

Why do I want this? Well, it turns me on. That's pretty simple. It gives me a sort of release. It takes responsibility off my shoulders for a while. It doesn't mean that I deserve it. I'm CHOOSING it. That's what makes it ok. I believe that submission is a gift. You can NOT tell me what to do and how to act unless I ALLOW you to do so.....it's called consent and if you try anything without consent, you're an asshole. I'm ultimately in control. If you believe that I should be treated with anything less than respect and care, you're not worthy of my time or submission. This is what allows this all to work for me. Sure, I may belong to you, I may be your property, but you better be caring for me as if I'm your most prized possession. Use me long and hard, do what you will with me.....but then take the time to snuggle me up, wipe away the dirt and tears, validate my thoughts and feelings, and keep me safe in life. I want you to want the best for me......because that translates to the best for you down the line. 

In reality, a D/s relationship is symbiotic relationship. It takes two to tango. I will make sure your coffee is served every morning, just the way you like it, and that you don't forget to bring those important papers to your morning meeting, and that you get the best damn blowjob you've ever had in your life, every time I see you, and that you get to pee in my mouth, drag me through the dirt, and call me names if that's what you want.....but I need you to NOT TOUCH MY DAMN NIPPLES!!!! Seriously...and recognize that I need to go play in the sandbox with my kid so I can't be in heels and stockings all day, and my family counts on me to make dinner for them every night, and that I may have more experience than you in certain areas of life so my ideas have worth. Basically, you're NOT the center of the universe, even if I treat you that way. You're not better than me. We're equal in this game. Because it is a game. A game that we may choose to take very seriously but it needs to be played within the confines of real life. 

In conclusion, I think that it IS possible to maintain my dignity while still engaging in a serious and sexy D/s relationship. I just need to be respected and cared for. My Dom and I need to trust each other and keep lines of communication open. Boundaries need to be established. Lines must not be crossed. We both need to want it. With this, a strong, deep, and beautiful D/s relationship can blossom. 

Yes Please!